Mimi Monlogues: Charlie: One Month Later!

Charlie reached a milestone today: One month old! Alyssa and I realized we both had the same thoughts regarding how Charlie's "look" is evolving. We've both decided - independent of one another yet!! - that when Charlie is sleeping, he is a dead ringer for his mom (and the way SHE looked at Charlie's age). But when he is awake, Charlie is looking a whole lot like his daddy. Now how does he accomplish that? We haven't a clue...but he certainly does.

Today when I arrived at the Wagner's, camera in hand, Charlie and his daddy were hangin' out on the couch - I won't post a picture here because perhaps Alyssa will because I think it's awfully darned cute, but since she is back to blogging (did you notice the absence for a few days? More on that later), I wanted to give her first option to post that cutie-pie picture. (Now you HAVE to post that picture, Alyssa, are you listening?????) :)

So back at Casa Wagner Ranch, it was time for a feeding so we hiked the stairway to the nursery where Charlie's mommy launched into the changing routine, which was definitely interfering with Charlie and his zzzzzz's. (Charlie is such a guy...he can sleep through a bomb blast!) But at last the baby blues were beginning to open - but no crying. Alyssa said he's not thrilled with changes of diapers nor clothing. But he was a good boy. Probably knew he was a month old and beyond that baby crying stuff.

But some stretching prevailed and he came through like a trooper.

And after a bit more of the paparazzi blasting away, it was finally Mimi's turn to hold him for a time. He is definitely a snuggle bunny. And Charlie, to commerate his advanced age, did a really neat thing today. As I was holding him, he found his mother. His blue eyes lasered in on her and then, as she moved, he proceeded to follow her with his eyes - even to the point of turning his head. Yes, Charlie, you are simply brilliant!

And what has this first month brought? Well. I am tremendously enjoying watching my beautiful, sleep-deprived, hormonally-challenged second born daughter discover what it's like being a mommy. How things she used to enjoy (such as her fun blog) temporarily slipped by the wayside as she tried to concentrate on not going entirely bonkers. Like how a baby on the INSIDE is SOOOOOO much different than a baby on the OUTSIDE. The insights to her thinking... how last week she remarked that she didn't think Charlie likes her. This is because she feels she can't calm him down when he's fussy, and how it seems to her that everybody ELSE can. That sometimes with Charlie she "likes him better" when she has a little break (who hasn't said - or at least THOUGHT - that at least a gazillion times!). And that she never realized how easy dogs were to care for compared to babies.

Yes, Alyssa is getting the picture of what it's like becoming a mom. The light is dawning. And as her older sister, Ashley, has said many a time - "NO ONE can prepare you for what being a parent is really like - you can't understand it until you experience it."

Ashley went through this whirlwind of emotions, too, during her first month with Gracie. The nervousness (terror), the guilt, the exhaustion and, yes, the crazy pure love a mother feels toward her child. She summarized it perfectly when I flew down to Southern California during Gracie's second week on earth. I went to give her a hand when she was on her last nerve. She told me when I arrived, "I just want to say thank you. And I'm sorry." Sorry for what? That's right: the exhaustion, the terror, the guilt and the crazy pure love she knew I'd already experienced before her.

And when I went back to Long Beach the next time - when she had been a mommy for a few more weeks, with a little more experience under her belt, I witnessed a small miracle. My frightened, nervous young daughter with a brand new baby had changed. She had become a mom.

That's where Alyssa stands right now. I saw it in her eyes today. My anxious, confused daughter who, four short weeks ago, held her crying infant, pat-pat-patting him nervously, helplessly on his tiny back, is getting ready for her own small miracle. Alyssa is about to become a mom.