Column Catch-up

Eggs: They're not just for breakfast anymore...Well, no, that wasn't the title of my column but the strange egg above is...well, I WISH I could tell you about the strange egg above. Trouble is I stopped reading the description due to becoming too grossed out, so all I've gotta say about that is it has something to do with unhatched critters.

The same goes for this jolly guy. And no, I don't know if that's an actual photograph of the actual blowfish or if it's a mock-up. What isn't a mock-up is the apparently hundreds of people who die each year from improper blowfish preparation. So next time you're coming over for dinner, I can guarantee this will NOT be on the menu!

And what can I say about the above photo except...Have a heart. Ah, come on - have THREE of them. And again I didn't stick around to read the description of the photo but I'm pretty sure these chunky fellows are hearts. Hopefully not of humans. So if you would like to read my column about some pretty risky foods, just click on "The Column" link above on the right. There you'll find "Warning: Breakfast may be risky business."

Moving right along now to the little sweetie below. The photo's title is "School Girl" and yes, that is simply disturbing on so many levels. But she's a pretty spiffy looking pup and that's what my next column is about.

When Puddin, our Lhasa Apso, began to go blind I was advised to bathe and groom him myself if at all possible due to the loop that goes about a dog's neck at the groomer's. And a small, short-haired dog would've been infinitely easier to bathe and groom. But we had to take the bad with the good and just go for it.

To read about the grooming experience and the chaos that ensued, simply click on "The Column" link above and you'll find "Clever canine no match for this dog whisperer." Oh, and while you're at it, remember that dog grooming is best left to the professionals because dogs have been known to get a little "snippy" and we wouldn't want what's happening in the photo below to happen to you! Umm...OUCH! That's gotta hurt.

Finally, is it just me, or does the gal in the photo look A WHOLE LOT like Hillary Clinton? Maybe she's got a dog in training just in case hubby, Wild Bill, decides to bust another move with a White House intern...Till next time...

Impasses

Normally, when I haven't posted in awhile, I begin with a "Mea culpa" for ignoring my blogging for so long. After all, I DO have wonderful memories and even more wonderful pictures that I SHOULD be putting forth on a regular basis, right? Well... Woulda-Shoulda-Coulda...you know where THAT gets us!

So instead, I will say that more is on the way - for sure. More "Monday's Mimi Monologues" and more "Friday Flashbacks." More insight. More wisdom. (Well...) More laughs. It's coming. I promise.

Today I'm sharing something I stumbled onto while reading Oprah's daily e-mail. Yes, I know, she sends this to me PERSONALLY because Oprah and I are pals. The fact that we've never met and she technically doesn't know I'm alive is just a minor detail. Because Oprah does good stuff - for the world and for me. And here is today's Good Thing.

I love the writer, Anne Lamott. I particularly love her nonfiction writing. Nobody can bang a nail on the head like Miss Anne. So when I noticed on Oprah's personal e-mail to me today a piece written by Anne Lamott, I launched immediately into it.

Now I admit that when I first began the article I was a little lukewarm. "Hmmm...I thought. Looks like Annie is slipping a little." I mean, this same old talk of being who we aren't. Or not being who we are. Or something. Or - how we women should stop being such people pleasers. Who, me? Didn't I give that up eons ago?

Ok, that's when her piece hit me like a ton of bricks. Talk of finding yourself and the un-pretty process that sometimes accompanies it. What can you say about "the self that is revealed when dealing with your anger blows through all the calcification in your soul's pipes" - that's pretty heavy stuff, right? Here's where to find the complete article: http://www.oprah.com/article/omagazine/200911-omag-purpose-anne-lamott.

So maybe we do have a little dormant anger laying around right beneath the surface, just out of reach. Is that why things seem a little out of whack sometimes? Is that why I look at someone else - someone who looks perfectly normal and I think, "Hmph! How does SHE do it when I am such a mess?" I don't know; but MAYBE a little self-examination is in order. You know; when I have time and all...

And the "Impasses" mentioned in the title of this post? I found Anne Lamott's article because of a little impasse that happens at our house.

Mr. H. likes the TV on. Pretty much all day. On the news channel (CNN or sports) - and it's LOUD. So he can hear it when he's puttering about and also perhaps (this is my personal theory) because he's developed a buzzing or ringing in his ears that's pretty much constant and No, don't ask...I have already been bugging him to get to the doctor. At any rate, I would imagine TV noise would lessen that annoyance somewhat - I don't know.

The "impasse" comes because I crave quiet. Constant loud noise raises my blood pressure, makes me anxious, feels like hammers pounding in my head, calipers pressing into my temples. So this impasse is probably pretty trifling in the grand scheme of things, but still.

So when I returned from a few hours of running around downtown and found the TV blaring, I retreated to the quieter, far reaches of the house where I closed my door and read a few e-mails. Yes, I have lots to do in the main part of the house but I'll get to it. Later.

After reading Anne Lamott's article, maybe I have a lot to do here, too. The "here" inside my own head.